The Most Powerful Word in Leadership
In our engagements as Executive Coaches, we have found that one word can make a significant difference in a leader’s success. In our past videos and blogs, we have stated that the single biggest difference between a leader and a manager is, a leader, regardless of title, builds relationships where people willingly follow her or him.
The one word that will make a difference in a leader’s ability to successfully build relationships is the word “we.” We can do this. We did a great job on this. We have a great team. We have a great company. We have a lot of work yet to be done. We can figure this out.
Leaders who have a more difficult time in building strong relationships where people want to willingly follow them tend to use the word “I” instead of the word “we.” I have a great team. I made this sale. I told the team what goals needed to be achieved and I told them how to successfully accomplish the goals. I did this in my past job. I, I, I, me, me me… they sound like they are warming up for an opera.
There is one exception to using the word “I.” If you make a mistake or a problem occurs under your watch, the appropriate response is, “I take responsibility for fixing the problem and ensuring it does not occur again.”
Leaders recognize that they do not accomplish anything alone. If you are a leader who slips and tends to say, “I” when you should have said “we,” here are a couple of suggestions:
- Appoint a coach. Tell someone on your team that, from time to time, you slip and say “I” when you should have said “we.” If the coach hears you slip, have them call it to your attention.
- Write yourself a note. If you are going into a staff meeting, write the word “we” on a post-it note with a smiley face as a reminder. As you glance down at your post-it note, you will be reminded it is “we” who are the team.
- Apologize. If you do slip from time to time, be quick to apologize and correct your word choice.
Like all learning and personal change, you will go through four phases of thought management:
- You will not even know that you slipped and said “I.”
- You will say, “I” and then correct yourself later when you remember you slipped.
- You will think right before you say “I” and catch yourself before you say it.
- You no longer think or say “I”… “we” is your natural and first response.
Is one word change worth it? You bet it is. Successful leaders recognize that “we” draws people closer to them and are fond of frequently using the word “we.” People moving closer and following you, regardless of your title, makes you a leader.
View this blog in video format
You may also like:
- Is There a Difference Between a Leader and a Manager?
- Eleven Stupid Things Managers Do to Mess up Workplace Excellence
- Great Leaders are Great Learners
Filed Under: Leadership, Peter's Blog on November 24th, 2009
Leave a Reply