Have Courage – Ask for Feedback
How to Encourage and Receive Constructive Criticism
Have you ever said to your employees, “I value your input. Talk to me. Let me know how I’m doing. My door is always open, and I encourage you to give me feedback”? Now, here is the real test. Did you really mean it and did your actions demonstrate your willingness to listen to employees who were brave enough to give you feedback on your performance?
Would you agree that it’s easier to ask for employee input than to receive actual feedback? We give employees one message, but do our actions or responses, whether they are verbal or nonverbal, really convey our sincere interest in the feedback they may have for us? Was this employee heard?
In our experience working with many great leaders, we note that they consistently value employee feedback and work hard to ensure that the channels of communication between employee and boss remain direct and open. What do they do to keep employees coming to them with not only the good news, but with constructive criticism when needed?
-
Clarify the Message
When an employee talks to you about some aspect of your behavior that he or she perceives as needing to be changed, it is understandable that you may be taken by surprise. If an employee catches you by surprise, rather than defend your actions, get clarification on what the employee is saying. -
Ask for Specifics
We notice that great leaders have mastered the art of questioning to obtain the details they need to manage effectively. Asking the employee for specific and detailed information gives you more time to hear what the employee is really saying and allows you more time to process an effective response. -
Avoid Becoming Defensive
Great leaders know that they cannot lead a team in isolation. If you attempt to defend your actions when employees question you, you convey to employees that you really don’t want to know. This is apparent regardless of how many times you may have said that you have an open door policy. When you are tempted to defend your actions, focus instead on gaining more information from the employee. -
Apologize When Necessary
If something you have said or done has been upsetting to someone, apologize and explain that it was not your intent to come across as you did. Apologizing does not necessarily mean admitting guilt. After apologizing, question the individual to get more specific information regarding the impact of your actions. We are convinced that people who can genuinely apologize when there have been misunderstandings are far less likely to experience conflict in working relationships. -
Watch Your Body Language
Your actions may speak louder than your words. Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “What you are speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say.” When an employee is giving you feedback, make sure your body language says, “I want to hear this.” Avoid appearing rushed or cutting off employees before they have finished. Look at the individual and focus on appearing relaxed and open. Remember, giving you feedback is stressful for the employee. Make sure that your body language is not adding to the level of tension that already exists. -
Focus on Future Behavior
There is no arguing the fact that what is done is done. Release the past and focus on what you could do differently in the future. Occasionally you may not think that you are exhibiting the behavior that is causing an employee concern. For clarification, get specific details and make every attempt to understand how your actions could be perceived negatively by the employee. Once you have a clear picture of what it is that you have done or said that detracts from your leadership role, make every attempt to determine how you will handle similar situations in the future. The more you focus on changing future behavior, the less tempted you will be to defend your past behavior. -
Express Appreciation
In reference to receiving feedback, this is perhaps the most difficult step to take. When someone cares enough about your success to talk to you about an aspect of your performance that needs improvement, thank that person for sharing concerns with you. Saying to the individual, “Thanks, this is something I’m working on. I appreciate you talking to me,” helps ensure that the individual will come back to you the next time he or she has additional suggestions for change.
Receiving feedback is far tougher than giving feedback. Great leaders know, though, that the ability to listen and learn from others builds strong working relationships and enhances their success in all areas of their lives.
You may also like:
Filed Under: Leadership, Peter's Blog on January 22nd, 2010
Leave a Reply